Tag Archives: direction

It’s Okay to Say No (Guest Post)

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

It’s Okay to Say No

by Steph Beth Nickel

“It’s vital that people have access to this information. What would you think of using my research and writing a book? No need to put my name on it.”

Sounds like a writer’s dream, doesn’t it?

The material is sound. It could help a lot of people. Theoretically, I could carve out time in my schedule.

Still, I knew the right thing to do was to turn down the offer.

As writers, we don’t have to take on every opportunity that comes our way.

Granted, we don’t always have the freedom to say no, but when that is a viable option, it’s important to weigh the pros and cons.

Here are nine questions to ask yourself when considering an opportunity that comes your way. (As a Christian, I believe it’s important to do so prayerfully, asking God for wisdom and direction.)

  1. Does the prospect of taking on this project excite me?
  2. Do I have the skills necessary to complete this project—or am I able to acquire them in a reasonable amount of time?
  3. How long will it take to complete this project? (It’s always important to give yourself more time than you think you need. The more involved the project, the more margin you’ll want to factor in.)
  4. Will I have to set aside other projects in order to take this on?
  5. Will I have to sacrifice volunteer commitments and time with family and friends?
  6. Will I need the support of others? Is so, would it be reasonable to ask it of them?
  7. Is it reasonable to think that I will have the physical, mental, and emotional energy it will take to push through until this project is complete?
  8. Will the return on investment (ROI) be worth it? (ROI doesn’t always refer to financial gain. For example, the sense of satisfaction that comes from completing a project you’re passionate about can make it worth the time and effort.)
  9. If after asking myself this series of questions, I’m still undecided, who can I discuss this with who knows me and my situation well enough to give me wise counsel?

When faced with a decision, I like to remember Lysa TerKeurst’s book The Best Yes. The title pretty much says it all.

To sum up how to best make a decision, we can ask ourselves a single question: Is this the best yes for me at this time?

And remember…

It really is okay to say no.


Photo credit: Jaime Mellor Photography

As an editor, Steph Beth Nickel has the honour of coming alongside writers to help them polish their work. As the coauthor of Paralympian Deb Willows’s memoirs, Steph has been blessed to work with this amazing woman. And as a future self-published author, with the Lord’s help, Steph has taken brave steps toward publication.

If you would like more information about her services, you can contact her at stephbethnickelediting@gmail.com.

You’re invited to visit her website: http://stephbethnickeleditor.com/.

You can join her Editing Tips Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/418423519384351.

Is Quitting Right for You? (Guest Post)

Clock with words: time management, schedule, delay, stress, busy, alarm, late, rush, overtime

Is Quitting Right for You?

by Steph Beth Nickel

When should you set aside responsibilities? When should you press on? How do you decide?

My absence from Janet’s blog may or may not have been conspicuous, but when January and February slipped away, I had to ask myself, “Is this what God has for me going forward?”

Is this the only responsibility that has slipped? Absolutely not!

Since the time change—in the fall—tiredness and lack of motivation seem to have wrapped their arms (or is that tentacles?) around me.

Being an Expressive, I am among the group least likely to be overly concerned about missed deadlines. Not great when there are so many mandatory and “soft” deadlines in my life.

When Janet suggested I pray to see if God would have me continue writing for Tenacity, I thanked the Lord for friends such as her. No pressure, just concern that I follow the Lord’s path for my life.

So, how do we determine which responsibilities to take on and which ones to set aside? As Christians, we can ask the Lord for wisdom and direction—and He will give it.

Second, it’s a good thing to create a list of everything we do and prioritize the items on our list.

Some items on our list are mandatory—our day job and taking care of family for instance. However, when reviewing the remaining To Do items, we may want to determine which ones we feel called to and which we’re passionate about.

Now, if you’re eclectically interested, as I am, it may be hard to rank these in order of priority, which leads to the fourth thing we should do: be honest about our energy and abilities.

We may be skilled in many areas. We may be able to do a plethora of things each week, each day even. But can we do them well? Can we give them the time and attention they deserve? Can we do so without becoming exhausted and resentful? Can we do them without fear of burnout?

In humility we should ask, “Could someone else do this task? Could they do it more quickly and more efficiently than I can? Are they actually the right person for the job?”

I’m a little like Sister Bear from the Berenstain Bears. When my children were young, they watched and re-watched a video in which Sister Bear sang, “I want it all.” Truth be told, I’m like that. I suffer from what I call Butterfly Syndrome. I flit from thing to thing, claiming the whole garden as my own.

I’m like a plate spinner who tells herself, “Sure, the plate has slowed down … Sure, the pole is beginning to wobble … But I have lots of time to get to it before the fine china crashes to the floor.”

We must consider those who are counting on us.

Granted, I have some of the most understanding and forgiving friends, family, and clients in the world. Still, I have responsibilities to them, and if I can’t meet them, perhaps it’s time to set some of them aside—the responsibilities, not the people.

Last, but definitely not least, we must consider our Why.

Let’s go over that list we made item by item and determine why we’ve taken on each thing. When we know what motivates us, it helps us determine which items must stay on the list and which we can—and should—set aside.

Does this mean it will be easy? No. Often the things we’d prefer to set aside are actually the things that need our time and attention most.

Will I continue writing monthly posts for this blog? I hope so. But I’ll see after I prayerfully follow my own advice.

How do you determine what tasks to take on? Are there those that must go? Which tasks on your list make you want to jump out of bed in the morning (or stay up late) to accomplish?

~~~

Steph Beth Nickel
Steph Beth Nickel (Photo by Stephen G. Woo Photography)
Photo credit: Jaime Mellor Photography

As an editor, Steph Beth Nickel has the honour of coming alongside writers to help them polish their work. As the coauthor of Paralympian Deb Willows’s memoirs, Steph has been blessed to work with this amazing woman. And as a future self-published author, with the Lord’s help, Steph has taken brave steps toward publication.

If you would like more information about her services, you can contact her at stephbethnickelediting@gmail.com.

You’re invited to visit her website: http://stephbethnickeleditor.com/.

You can join her Editing Tips Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/418423519384351.